ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
