While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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