You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
