when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
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We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
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He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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