he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
