I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize