Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
It was confusing and full of hummus
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
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Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
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Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.