i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
