Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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