ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
My nipple is on Facebook.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
