I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize