Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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