absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Just high enough for therapy.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
