We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
