i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i will never coherently bang her
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?