No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize