you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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