We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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