Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
