another moral hangover. fuck.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
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According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
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Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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