Texts From Last Night

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  (469): View more from Texas

  is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?

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  (469): is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl? http://tfl.nu/85q0
  Replies (23) Good night (3857) Bad night (709) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone

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  (609): He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone http://tfl.nu/qd6w
  Replies (31) Good night (2166) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.

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  (239): Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread. http://tfl.nu/62jg
  Replies (18) Good night (7707) Bad night (799) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?

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  (503): I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant? http://tfl.nu/9d2p
  Replies (15) Good night (582) Bad night (3027) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter

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  (732): i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter http://tfl.nu/90no
  Replies (15) Good night (5520) Bad night (921) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.

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  (218): time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink. http://tfl.nu/47ui
  Replies (15) Good night (3994) Bad night (1006) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  K. On the way. I need a drink.

  (904): View more from Florida

  Like a drink drink or like water?

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Have we met?

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  (601): K. On the way. I need a drink. (904): Like a drink drink or like water? (601): Have we met? http://tfl.nu/ckaw
  Replies (10) Good night (6057) Bad night (781)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno

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  (727): We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno http://tfl.nu/ajny
  Replies (12) Good night (3712) Bad night (886) Order T-Shirt
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Either way, he made a blog for his cat.

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  (870): Either way, he made a blog for his cat. http://tfl.nu/y9xq
  Replies (4) Good night (1171) Bad night (3337) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down

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  (303): We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down http://tfl.nu/easv
  Replies (12) Good night (4189) Bad night (781) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?

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  (519): Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin? http://tfl.nu/eyam
  Replies (14) Good night (2766) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.

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  (312): I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy. http://tfl.nu/9mbp
  Replies (5) Good night (572) Bad night (2151) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.

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  (845): Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent. http://tfl.nu/1ynv
  Replies (10) Good night (746) Bad night (381) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.

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  (717): Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it. http://tfl.nu/5u1i
  Replies (4) Good night (1180) Bad night (319) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh

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  (518): you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh http://tfl.nu/hnvd
  Replies (6) Good night (1408) Bad night (278) Order T-Shirt

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