I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize