hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway