now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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