Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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