I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
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officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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