You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
well you can't waste a boner
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
