shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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