I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
