i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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