So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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