we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize