dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
kristin has been a bad kristin
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
