So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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