I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
