We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
