on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
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My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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