i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
handjob tips. give me some.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
