Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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