I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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