if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?