If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
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Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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