Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
