To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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