She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
