I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
