If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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