I think scott just propositioned me for sex
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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