So gin and wine won't be happening again
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now