no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she was so not down for the gang bang
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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