By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize