I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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